The emptiness in the mirror of love
Have you ever thought about what is there, on the reverse part of the mirror? Just have a look. A few minutes ago you saw a happy, smiling, beautiful woman and in one moment you see nothing. All joy is vanished. A person who was betrayed feels roughly the same. Something changes inside your heart elusively: it becomes empty for some time. Then anger, insult, desire to revenge settles in your soul. Then maybe, forgiveness takes place. But nevertheless, there comes a moment when your heart is empty. What leaves it? First of all - belief. Belief as a trust to the world.
A person is born the helpless: he is not capable to support the life himself. He can trust only the world that the latter will leave us alive. In the beginning we are looking for support from mother and we trust her. We need warmth, food and love as a feeling of confidence that we will be cured. Being a child we learn to cooperate with friends, passers-by and to trust them in some way. Someone manages to do it better, someone - worse. But sooner or later, each of us finds himself facing mirror and sees there emptiness. And it seems that the world has turned away. How it happens? Differently. And it is always unexpected. After all a treachery essence is a failure of our trust to the most important things, and the beginning of it is where our belief comes to an end. The conclusion is sad: treachery cannot be expected.
Only the closest person is capable to betray. Only the closest person could see our weak points and knew all secrets and only on the closest person we could set our hopes. Was it worth it? To betray the person whom we depend and who is psychologically helpless (as the baby) is much easier than the one who leaves the important questions to itself, instead of gives to solve them to someone. Notorious leaving of the husband - in one case an annoying prick of destiny, and in other - crash of a picture of the world. And if your case is the second one, consider that the husband has given you a gift. He has given the chance to you to be convinced that you can live and without him. The world picture will be restored. And to you will live more cheerfully.
Women are often perceived by men, as beings a little predicted and badly operated. Men prefer to be ready to sharp maneuver, instead of to be duped. And the truth, statistics obstinately shows that though more often divorces are initiated by the women, the thrown husbands successfully overtake the former wives, and in a month after divorce they can be met handling the new girl-friend, walking directly nearby. Such impression that they only waited, when this sweet instant of freedom comes. He argues approximately so: «my wife is such a boring person that it simply remains nothing for me then to get another lover, to console the grief. Yes all men deed so ... » Some men concern themselves, as to little boys who need a consolation and care. But it doesn't excuse their betrayal.
To forgive inexcusable it is possible only in one way. It works despite the paradoxicality. Try to understand what has compelled the offender to behave such way. Especially it is important in case of intended evil deeds in your address. Think: what have you made that has forced to do much harm so awfully to you? Imagine how badly the person who has gone on so ugly act felt. You do not think, that the close person could strike you resembling, without reflecting, do you? So, there were reasons! And, possibly, they were serious. And, as it is sad, this reason - you. And you, possibly, have done not smaller harm. And how could it possibly happen? It is the most interesting. And when you find the answer - ask for excuse for the part of your bad deed. You will feel much better. Believe me!
Simply think once again, what really was a problem when you were betrayed? The fact that you were betrayed? Or - feelings which have gushed over you? It is the important question. Just imagine: the husband has left the wife in the morning, and after a dinner she has got to know that she wonderfully the proprietress of a country house on Islands, new BMW and the marriage contract from Leonardo di Caprio. Will she still be sad by the evening? A complicated question, isn't it? Now you understand that any treachery is inside our mind, not outside.