An unplanned pregnancy

Author: admin |Wed, 06/10/2009

14 My first daughter was "not planned", but it has given the chance to me to understand that the child cannot be at the wrong time. How to cope with the first shock from occurrence of two strips and to accept this news with pleasure, even if, apparently, all seems to be against?

First of all try not to blame yourself that news about pregnancy has not caused happiness. You are mature person and understand that the kid is not only great pleasure and a God gift, but also a responsibility. Believe me, some confusion is noticed also at those mummies by whom the kid has been planned (as my second sonny). The feeling of responsibility, alarm for the future, and change in a life will not prevent you to love the "unexpected" kid less, rather than the most long-awaited, it is not worse than the planned at all. If a child decided to be born, rejoice - everything is all right with you!

The sense of guilt became one more important point (at least for me): if I was protected from «undesirable pregnancy», it means I did not want a birth of this child. The information that babies feel all mum's emotions already in a tummy troubled me a lot, meaning that I did not plan pregnancy. However nobody says that the pregnant woman has no right to negative emotions in general! Simply try to be adjusted on the maximum positive after getting "pregnant" news as the majority from seeming global problems, are actually easily surmountable. For example, the most widespread reason of the alarm is formulated as «I am not yet ready to be mother». The similar reason often those mums name who do not wish to change habitual way of life where everything is in order, and the kid can limit their active possibilities. But here there is a natural question: do you think, I was ready not to sleep at night, to be adhered to a small crying out lump by means of a breast and to depart from washing only to iron? No, it is impossible to be ready to it! Surprisingly, but in some time you start to like this rhythm of life!

Readiness to be mother is not defined by so strong requirement to love, but by ability to mature in right time and nobody will help to reach it better then the kid: near to his defenselessness and tenderness every woman begins to feel stronger and more responsible. The powerful reason can also be «I can't have a child for the material reasons». Certainly, the birth of the kid demands material inputs, but there is a plenty of ways to save. Diapers will be presented to you on a birth and it is perfectly possible to do without a bed, and a lot of other things.

But there is a maternity and birth benefit, and the main thing is rational usage of it and your small savings. In any way you may start freelancing! Serious problems with health - is also not an occasion to refuse motherhood. There are, of course, diseases at which pregnancy can be dangerous, but nevertheless the most part of problems with health quite gives in if not to treatment, then just updating.

And now concentrate and think: not planned pregnancy has a lot of pluses! First, it is the child: time will pass, carrying away with itself difficulties and barriers, and the kid for ever remains with you, giving caress, smiles and kisses. No one could love you so sincere and so much as your own child!

Not less important fact is that with the childbirth the brain of the woman does not decrease at all as somebody may consider, on the contrary, unknown earlier potential and creative possibilities are revealed.

Active mum learns to be organized and responsible; dialogue with the kid gives her plenty of openings: about the world, people, about him\herself ... before bringing up a child every mother brings up herself first. She even learns things which she would never get to learn without having a child. Isn't it a mind boarding? Now from the day of birth you are the first and the wisest teacher for your child.

Someone from heavens has decided to give you a wonderful gift. Is it rational to refuse from such gifts?


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