Cease arguing!

Probably there are no marriages in which the husband and the wife never quarreled with each other. It happens because men and women perceive world around differently. Sometimes even a bad mood may cause a great explosion. Some disagreement in views is inevitable in any unions. In general to quarrel is as easy as shelling pears, but not everyone has an idea how to turn it in a peace way. It probably comes with experience. Men and women understand quarrel differently, and differently react to emotional conflicts. Often their opinions about fair dispute, contradict each other. They can disperse even in a question what to consider as quarrel. Men, flash faster and these flashes last longer, than at women. They are tenderer and more often feel stresses. Besides, the man's organism develops a lot of adrenaline which operates very excitingly and leaves an organism with great difficulty.

Both women and men, as it is known, like to use dishonest methods in quarrels. Women use tears as argument, and men are for a long time reserved by silence. Men considerably willingly, than women keep silence with the opponent. Though ignoring of the partner or a problem in some way helps them to postpone stresses, such behavior already creates a stressful situation for their wives. When the woman notices that the man avoids questions at issue, she tries to discuss directly these questions more often. However women leave the conflict easier and forgive more quickly than a man. If you wish to stop dispute prematurely agree with arguments of the partner. And on the contrary, telling something negative, pass in an attack.

It is necessary to tell that for women quarrel is bigger disappointment, than for men. Even today the man plays to a family a role of the defender. For the woman quarrel looks as if all worlds have gone mad: the one who always was the loyal friend and the reliable defender, suddenly attacks it. It seems to the woman that she was betrayed. The man perceives dispute simply as dispute. One of effective ways to avoid quarrel consists in ability of both parties to speak and listen serially. One person should speak, and another at this time to perceive its words. A role of the listener more difficult. You should force yourself to understand that your interlocutor speaks, without trying to answer back whether you agree with him or not. Good mean for this purpose is to stop talking each 20-30 seconds and to reproduce the thought, to be convinced that you understand how he intends to state it.

Anyway the most important thing is to slow down the pressure. The longer the pressure last, the more difficult it is to take the first step. If you wish to stop quarrel at first calm down and glance in yourself - you really wish to reconcile? If so, find forces to refuse both passion, and from desire to reserve last word. Think that you do not wish to lose the close person, do not wish to hurt him, that you love him. What to tell, how to find the necessary and correct words? Here everything depends only on you - if your desire is sincere, words will come. It is not necessary to say that dispute was silly and for this reason to offer it to finish. Suddenly other part does not consider the reason of quarrel as nonsense, and on the contrary, for him\her the decision is very important? It is possible, of course, to try to postpone the decision for tomorrow, but it may happen that during this time there will be new arguments, and quarrel will flash with new force? And here, if you sincerely tell simple words: - «I love you and I do not wish to quarrel with you», for certain even if dispute will not stop he becomes definitely less disputed. «You are very beautiful when you are angry!» - Tell while your half is least ready to hear it. Usually from surprise the partner gets off and loses a sence of quarrel. However, and these words it is necessary to tell sincerely that they wouldn't look as empty compliment. Some couples finish quarrel simply - refer to urgent matters, for example, it is necessary to switch off an oven and so on - you can turn on your imagination. And  leave in the kitchen, in a bathroom, in other room, allowing to a fight to cool down. And sometimes it is very useful to listen to everything that to you wish to tell, without interrupting. It is clear that it is difficult, but ... But it is the most difficult to understand that you are guilty and to recognise it. Recognising the fault, you disarm the partner. Try, it is a right way. And remember some simple trues: Do not attack the favourite person, do not laugh at him, cease to teach him in each occasion, do not prove constantly his inconsistency and a wrongfulness and do not deceive. And the most important thing is to reconcile! Finally, you should let your love and a mutual respect win your disagreements. Eventually, you marry for this purpose for any joint purpose to have pleasure every day and to see and love each other. You do it not to quarrel. But certain contradictions are inevitable. If you learn to solve them, you will be simply happy!